Habit? How to Make It Stick

With a new year comes a reset button. The slate is wiped clear and we step into a fresh dream of how our ideal life could be. This year I will… (fill in the your desire here). By January’s end our resolutions are gathering dust. You may find yourself snoozing instead of hitting the gym, or you start to give in on that 2 glass of wine rule and have an extra one before bed (just this one time…right?)

But some people seem to have so much more staying power. You know, “Perfect Patty”, your co-worker who seems to be on a roll with her daily lunch of healthy salads and taking the stairs. What actually makes the difference to those who keep on track with a new goal and are successful?

When our shiny new resolutions begin to slip, it’s easy to think things like, “What is wrong with me? Why can’t I do it? Do I just need more will power? Do they just want ‘it’ more than I do? Do they have more support?  What if I had more money to hire a fancy personal trainer? Or an assistant to manage my crazy schedule? THEN I will be successful!”

I work with people to make lifestyle changes, and when we are successful, these changes make big positive impacts across their lives, deepening a sense of purpose and building a strong foundation to go forth and be even more awesome. I want to make that difference with people so, of course, I am always nerding it up on new brain science around habit, routine, structure, and what we are now finding about why we do what we do and why we don’t. Here is what I found.

Willpower Is So Yesterday

Put down the bat of self disapproval and shame. Turns out, what was once thought of as low will or being lazy is just lack of planning. Planning can be packing our lunch the night before rather than in the a.m. as we rush out the door. It can also look like a new schedule or bringing the gym shoes to the office so we have no excuses. We are either setting up our environment for success or we’re just mindlessly going with what was already in play. We can plan and create an atmosphere that is physically conducive to making the changes we desire.

Make a Plan for Success and Failure

Plan for what will you do when it fails. When you oversleep (or umm push snooze 5 times), or you have a sick kid, or a deadline that is dropped in your lap, what is your plan for that? What we often define as failure (relapse, falling off the wagon, repeating old patterns we are comfy in that cause us to feel miserable) are all part of what being successful looks like. It teaches us how to dust ourselves off and keep going. Most of life will not go as planned, so having the “oh sugar backup” is where it’s at to getting our well-deserved success.

Track It To Change It

Powerhouse digital companies know this about us, we need a lot of cues to change our behavior, so they are coming up with resources to help us win. Seems everyone is wearing a smart device that measures, track, time and measure our efforts. Tracking can be helpful to show us how we are failing and well, that’s successful. We no longer use the power of will but now can use consistency and accountability.

Remember, a new habit is new and you are in fact learning. There is a curve to this, so allow for it. We can measure it with complicated technical devices or use a pencil and paper, it really doesn’t matter. The key is consistency. How you create the consistency is what will bring you the results you desire.

Again and Again

So if it’s not really willpower, then what is it? Turns out it’s simple, a matter of repetition. We are what we repeatedly do, says Aristotle. What we all want is to turn our new habits into automatic action without thought. What can I do to have automaticity alive and well in my life? According to top scientists and the wisdom of sages throughout history, it’s all about consistency.

Let It Sink In

Give it time. How much time? How much time does it take before a new habit becomes hardwired? Some say a mere 21 days. I have read and heard everything under the stars from the range of 21 days to 180 days. So what is the magic number, really? And why? When you are giving everything you’ve got to making change, it would be nice to know when you can expect your payoff. Just like everything else in life, it depends on the individual and the depth of dive or habit complexity for you. Simply adding a fruit to your daily diet maybe be child’s play for some, while exercising consistency could take a bit more effort. So allow for your own timing to come forth and enjoy the journey.

How To Make It Stick

Plan it. Measure it. Then repeat it and let it sink in. Soon you will have a new habit you don’t even have to think about. Now that is awesome.

Further Reading:



Keeping Your New Year Resolutions

Happy New Year!  I know New Year’s Day was a while ago, which is precisely why I’m writing now. We usually start the year full of enthusiasm to achieve our new goals and New Year’s resolutions, but it’s about this time, shortly after the New Year, that we start to falter a bit and sometimes even give up on our goals completely. I recently wrote a few books all about your personal best; that, in fact, is the title of one of them. I’m a firm believer that we can be extraordinary any time of year if we find meaning in what we’re doing and have reasons to give the extra effort that it takes to excel. I don’t write just about motivation. I’m a health and fitness guy, too. In fact, my book, Vegan Bodybuilding & Fitness comes out in late February. I’ve learned over the years that your personal best can be achieved in anything as long as you care enough to make it happen. To borrow a quote from my book:

It is my experience that if you truly love something, you will be willing to spend a lot of time doing it, will be willing to work harder than others to achieve it, and will have so much fun throughout the process that you will excel naturally.  The joy and fulfillment you get from being regularly engaged in the activity you love will propel you to stand out in your field adapting and improving at rapid rates. You will look forward to practice, rehearsal, application, and action in whatever it is that moves you. Through your discipline and dedication, you will thrive in an environment you created that is perfect for you to succeed in. Because you’re doing what you love, you’ll be in a positive mood on a regular basis, will find the good in every situation, will get back up when you’re knocked down, and will time and time again overcome adversity when others with less passion will give in and give up.”

What should be understood is that we all have the power to change something in our lives at anytime, no matter what time of year. As always, now is the best time to start something new. What do you really want to get out of life? What does it really mean to you and how hard are you willing to work to achieve it? What steps need to be taken and when are you ready to say, “Today is the day I’m going to make it happen?”

To help yourself actually stick to the “New Year’s Resolutions” that you create , make sure you’ve answered the following questions:

  1. What are the activities I am most passionate about and that bring me the most joy?
  2. What makes me wake up every day excited to do what I get to do for my job?
  3. What can I do every day to bring about the most fulfillment in my life?
  4. What makes me smile more than anything else?
  5. What would I do if money and time weren’t limiting obstacles in my life?
  6. What does my dream life look like?
  7. What steps do I need to take in order to achieve what I really want in life?

Answer those questions honestly and sincerely.

Your personal best isn’t just about motivation and doing what you love to do. It’s about being healthy, happy, and well, too. My inspirational partner and personal wellness coach, Julia Abbott, has some helpful and healthful tips for being at your best this year:

Health & Fitness for the New Year – by Julia Abbott

I know winter is far from over, but it’s not too early to start getting your beach body back. I know; it’s tough to fight the hibernation impulse. A little hibernation is therapeutic, but make it your goal right now to take action, alter stagnating behaviors, and implement a few new tools toward shaping up for the new year. Here are 5 simple steps to get healthier, to be more fit, and to increase energy. What better way to start the new decade?

Step 1

Eat fruit for breakfast. Fruit contains all the components needed to digest itself and requires little assistance from the body. Fruit for breakfast awakens the body and stimulates elimination channels. Proper elimination is the most important factor for improved health and weight loss. Breakfast is easy–just grab a piece of delicious, juicy fruit and bite in!

Step 2: Eat at least one green salad every day. Greens are so important because they contain an array of nutrients in perfect proportion to nourish the body’s tissues and cells. They even contain plenty of amino acids to help you build muscle! It can be difficult to eat that green salad every day. I love greens, but I get tired of them, too! The solution to getting your greens every day and loving it is the green smoothie. By making my green smoothie every morning, I knock out steps 1 and 2 at the same time: fruit first and greens every day! This is what my green smoothie was this morning:

  • 1/4 cup of purified water
  • Half organic cucumber
  • 1 peeled lime
  • 1 ripe banana
  • Big handful of spinach
  • Handful of baby lettuces and herbs
  • 1 tbsp freshly ground flax seed or a carefully cold-pressed flax oil
  • 1 cup of frozen pineapple

I just toss it all into my Vitamix and blend. Making breakfast and eating my greens takes 10 minutes tops. Fantastic! Note that it is important to rotate your greens and get creative with your smoothie ingredients.

Step 3: Find an enjoyable form of physical activity and schedule it into your day. Exercise doesn’t have to take a long time. I do enjoy going to the gym for an hour-long workout, but very often, I just don’t have that kind of time. I solve this problem by waking up 15 minutes early to perform a quick, high-intensity workout that gets my blood and lymph moving. If you haven’t discovered CrossFit yet, check it out because that is exactly what you need if you are short on time. By 9a.m., you can have 3 steps knocked out.
Try this quick and simple workout tomorrow morning:

  • 5 push-ups
  • 10 sit-ups
  • 15 squats

Perform this set as many times as you can for 10 intense minutes. No money or equipment necessary.

Step 4

Quit drinking sodas and bottled beverages. These drinks are full of highly refined sugar or toxic sugar substitutes that do nothing but subtract from your overall health.

If you are attached to the fizz factor, try drinking sparkling water with fresh lime. If you are attached to the sugar factor, replace the soda with kombucha, a fermented beverage containing beneficial organisms that aid in digestion and detoxification. When I get post-lunch sugar cravings, drinking kombucha knocks the craving out.

Feel a caffeine headache coming on? Sip Yerba Maté tea, an infusion similar to green tea. When I drink Yerba Maté for an energy boost, I do not experience negative side effects such as jitteriness, headaches, or nausea that come from drinking coffee.

Step 5: Eliminate fried foods. Fried foods are detrimental for two reasons: they contain trans fat and they are usually fried in polyunsaturated vegetable oil.

Trans fat is an artery-clogging fat formed when vegetable oil is made to be solid at room temperature. Read the labels on any packaged food and look for “hydrogenated”, “partially hydrogenated”, and “shortening”. Strictly avoid these foods to avoid gradual health decline.

Polyunsaturated oils (canola and soybean, for example) are highly susceptible to heat damage. Heat causes oxidative damage creating free radicals. Translation: after heat exposure these oils become cancer causing.
The bottom line is, there is absolutely no reason your body would want you to eat french fries or doughnuts. There is plenty of healthful, natural food to eat instead. For a mid-morning snack, try a slice of toasted sprouted-grain bread topped with nut butter.

If you start the new year by following these 5 steps, you will be feeling better and looking better in no time. Cheers to your beach body 2010!

Julia Abbott is a competitive runner, avid weight lifter and Author of  The Lemon Letter – A wellness blog dedicated to a holistic approach to ultimate health.